I’m always amazed how some couples have no problem fighting in public. Once I stood in the popcorn line at the movies and the couple in front of me were arguing. In this case, the man was way out of line.
I wanted to take his popcorn, soft drink, and hot cheesy nachos and dump them down his pants.
Some people are, well, just flat unlovable. On good days we call them “jerks.” On bad days we’re tempted to cross the line and be jerks right back at them.
It’s for those days the Scriptures urge us:
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. . . . If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath. —Romans 12:17–19
Sometimes this command seems impossible with jerks. And honestly?
It is.
Only with God’s help can you deal with the jerks in your life.
Remember when Mike Tyson bit off part of Evander Holyfield’s ear during a heavyweight fight? Holyfield later said:
Attitude is what causes us to fail. If you can control your emotions, you can control a lot of things. —Evander Holyfield
Attitude. What attitude should you adopt when someone is a complete jerk?
Some people, it seems, refuse to be peaceful. That’s why Paul qualified his command: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Notice that while you can’t control their actions, you CAN control yours: “as far as it depends on you.” Your input into the exchange should be peaceable, regardless of theirs.
But how?
We may never change the jerks in our lives. But neither do they have to change us. (Tweet that.)
Let’s turn the tables for a moment.
When YOU are a jerk to your spouse or to a close friend, they have two possible reactions:
Turn the tables back around and apply this personally.
Am I not destroying my enemies by making them my friends? —Abraham Lincoln
The attitude God had toward us was to woo us to His side through grace (Romans 5:8). He still does, in fact:
Do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance? —Romans 2:4
It was goodness that overcame evil for our souls. Such can do the same in our relationships, God willing.
In the end, we may never change the jerks in our lives. But neither do they have to change us.
Learn the top 6 Lessons from Visiting the Holy Land more than 20 times in 21 years with Dr. Wayne Stiles, a longtime devotional scholar who is passionate about sharing the practical application of bringing God's Word to life.
Tell me what you think: What helps you respond well to jerks? To leave a comment, just click here.